Waited to Exhale...

I left off nearly 4 years ago. I have more catching up to do now than ever before! I had a visit with a friend yesterday who vlogs. Kudos to her, as that is much too personal and in your face for me. But her boldness and her zest to share the life she loves with others drew out a passion in me I have had buried for a long time.

I left off hoping I was pregnant before my husband deployed, but thinking I was not. Here's your update: I was not. But we are 4 years down the road, so there is, as Paul Harvey says, the rest of the story. Spoiler alert: I did get pregnant. But not before my husband deployed. In fact, it was while he was deployed and I was able to go see him in Bahrain, of all places. I will share that story in another post. But I wanted to update the blog and get it going again. Breathe life back in. After all of the losses, and then finding out I was pregnant again, for the 8th time, I couldn't update. I couldn't write. I couldn't express; I couldn't breathe. Because in those moments of hope after loss, I was simply waiting to exhale. I couldn't write about a baby that may not come again. So I didn't write at all. But thanks be to God, that baby made it and is here today, as my precious soon-to-be three year old tomorrow! But during the deployment, carrying an entire pregnancy alone after I flew back home to the states after seeing my husband, after hoping and waiting he'd make it back for the birth, after still yet wondering if this baby would be born, and after the baby was born, I was still holding my breath. It took months of my living, breathing baby snuggling and cooing, eating and pooing... months--to finally believe the baby was here to stay.

Then my husband was home. Then we moved. And life continued. And I was busy. And hiding. And loving my blessings. So I left the story behind to take a part in it. I believe I have finally come to a place worth sharing, time to share, and things so wonderful they are ready to be shared once again.

So give me some time (days, not years this time!) and I will share the story of the rest of the story... now that I have exhaled.