Just a quick note for May! This morning I got up early with the husband and while making breakfast, looked on the camera and saw little Bean was rolling around in bed. Daddy wanted to give him a quick snuggle before work so I suggested he go get Matthew and bring him to breakfast. I made oatmeal and split it with him. Daddy had to go to work then so Matthew and I sat at our table and ate oatmeal together.
Afterwards, we went downstairs and sat in my recliner for what we call "snuggle time." I usually read a book and drink my morning coffee while Matthew watches Thomas the Train, sitting in my lap under the big warm comforter. It is these morning snuggles that make me oh so very grateful to be blessed to be a stay at home mommy. I'm not sure I posted much about this, but a while back, I was getting restless (again) about 'just' staying at home. I felt I need more challenging brain tasks, adult conversations and interactions. I feel bad about not contributing financially to our ever-growing family. I know I am blessed, and I do not take it for granted. But some days I want more than "poop, pee, spills, messes, constantly cleaning the same thing, repeating the same book ten times, screams, fights, nap time fits, etc. etc." The bad seems a lot bigger than the good at times.
But mornings like today, the good outweighs the bad 100% and I can relax and settle into my current role. I know I won't always be in this position. Even if I never work, my role will change as I drive kids to practices, bake a million cupcakes, help with algebra, etc. etc. I believe it's all about contentment and finding light in ALL things. With a new baby coming soon, I realize I really have no choice but to sit back and relax for now. So I should be enjoying this special time with my little ones, not wishing I was somewhere else. Truth is, if I ever do get a full time job, I'm sure that I'll have plenty to complain about then as well! So for now, bring on the snuggly mornings and the sweet kisses, the gentle hugs and the 'needing mommy.' With this much practice, I'm beginning to think I'm actually very good at it anyway. ;)
